The Aesthetic Life
To some extent, everybody has an aesthetic duty to themselves. This is something I'm coming to learn, but it's taking a very long time to fully accept. I view aesthetic and ethics as siblings -- perhaps even twins -- they are almost identical, except the one deals with questions we allot a greater sense of triviality (beauty, image) and the other we take more seriously (how to treat others, how to comport yourself). However, in terms of their argumentative structures, my hunch is that they are identical. Ethics has been important to me for quite a long time now -- I've long been searching for how to live the good life -- but I see now that I can't ignore aesthetics either, as the more "trivial" elements also play quite important roles in what we call "the good life".
There are three examples that have been on my mind recently. The first is the aesthetics of your environment -- the places you spend the most time in, like your room. Historically I have been very negligent of the aesthetics of my environment. I tend to get lost in my mind and in my online spaces, so I've always thought it never really mattered. But it's becoming clearer to me now that a little effort does make a difference. For example, at least keeping it neat and tidy: the aesthetics of a tidy room are both beautiful and help to keep the mind clear and less stressed. You can also use these spaces to remind yourself of things that are important to you -- pictures of loved ones, slogans/quotes you like, pictures of places you adored -- and in this way aesthetics mingles with ethics, reminding you of the things you live for. I think I'll try harder with this in the future.
The second is the aesthetics of personality. I realised this when I was quite young, but by not reflecting on it it's begun to slip away from me: everybody adopts a persona in the face of others; everybody wears a mask. You're either conscious of that mask or you're not conscious of it, but you are wearing it. Nobody has direct access to who you are as deep down, unmediated: you have to show them through action and language, and this is your mask. The aesthetic action is to make an art of your personality: that is, to be conscious of your masks (plural, you often change around others) and tailor them in specific ways. I used to be better at this when I was a little younger -- I used to be more aware of these things -- but now I've fallen off, let my mask become subconscious and just adopted whatever happens to come. I think I may have convinced myself that this is a good thing through important and true thoughts about externalising your interests, but I see now that making an art of your personality and externalising your interests can work hand-in-hand. Just because you place your interest in things out in the world instead of in your self and your neuroses, it doesn't mean you can't be mindful of the image you are projecting out to that external world. You can still adopt a certain kind of elocution, affect certain gestures, and appropriate tropes from here and there to bolster and strengthen your character. It's a tight line to walk, but I think you can do all that while still focusing outwards in most of your interests. They can intermingle and you can find a way to make them both work. A middle way.
The third is the aesthetics of romance, of love. This involves the image of the person you want to be with and the image you want to project as a couple. There is a girl that I know at present who is enamoured with me, about whom I have to decide whether being with her fits well with my personal aesthetics of romance. And for the longest time it hadn't, but she's changed a few things, and these days it sort of is working. I have to decide whether I want to properly be with her. She has made it absolutely clear she wants to be with me -- I've never been in this position before. I've never been the pursued. I feel scared to make any commitments yet. Scared because if my feelings change, I'll break her heart; but scared also of the fact that if I choose this now, perhaps I'll miss out on some girl who would better fit my aesthetics of romance. Does it matter if you slowly work towards that romantic spark, instead of feeling it fiercely and immediately? Does that make it less legitimate? I don't think it does. However, I am afraid that it might cause me to feel less... loyal to her than I would have if I had immediately felt the spark fiercely. I think I just need more time, more time in her presence, more time to truly contemplate whether I want she and I to be an 'us', aesthetically speaking.
The aesthetic life is the just-as-difficult other side of the coin of life -- the opposite side bearing the face of ethics. But I think it's about time I started thinking about it more and incorporating it into my life more seriously. It doesn't have to be trivial. The things above that I've listed are all rather important, despite being about appearances. The triviality of aesthetics is a lie.
There are three examples that have been on my mind recently. The first is the aesthetics of your environment -- the places you spend the most time in, like your room. Historically I have been very negligent of the aesthetics of my environment. I tend to get lost in my mind and in my online spaces, so I've always thought it never really mattered. But it's becoming clearer to me now that a little effort does make a difference. For example, at least keeping it neat and tidy: the aesthetics of a tidy room are both beautiful and help to keep the mind clear and less stressed. You can also use these spaces to remind yourself of things that are important to you -- pictures of loved ones, slogans/quotes you like, pictures of places you adored -- and in this way aesthetics mingles with ethics, reminding you of the things you live for. I think I'll try harder with this in the future.
The second is the aesthetics of personality. I realised this when I was quite young, but by not reflecting on it it's begun to slip away from me: everybody adopts a persona in the face of others; everybody wears a mask. You're either conscious of that mask or you're not conscious of it, but you are wearing it. Nobody has direct access to who you are as deep down, unmediated: you have to show them through action and language, and this is your mask. The aesthetic action is to make an art of your personality: that is, to be conscious of your masks (plural, you often change around others) and tailor them in specific ways. I used to be better at this when I was a little younger -- I used to be more aware of these things -- but now I've fallen off, let my mask become subconscious and just adopted whatever happens to come. I think I may have convinced myself that this is a good thing through important and true thoughts about externalising your interests, but I see now that making an art of your personality and externalising your interests can work hand-in-hand. Just because you place your interest in things out in the world instead of in your self and your neuroses, it doesn't mean you can't be mindful of the image you are projecting out to that external world. You can still adopt a certain kind of elocution, affect certain gestures, and appropriate tropes from here and there to bolster and strengthen your character. It's a tight line to walk, but I think you can do all that while still focusing outwards in most of your interests. They can intermingle and you can find a way to make them both work. A middle way.
The third is the aesthetics of romance, of love. This involves the image of the person you want to be with and the image you want to project as a couple. There is a girl that I know at present who is enamoured with me, about whom I have to decide whether being with her fits well with my personal aesthetics of romance. And for the longest time it hadn't, but she's changed a few things, and these days it sort of is working. I have to decide whether I want to properly be with her. She has made it absolutely clear she wants to be with me -- I've never been in this position before. I've never been the pursued. I feel scared to make any commitments yet. Scared because if my feelings change, I'll break her heart; but scared also of the fact that if I choose this now, perhaps I'll miss out on some girl who would better fit my aesthetics of romance. Does it matter if you slowly work towards that romantic spark, instead of feeling it fiercely and immediately? Does that make it less legitimate? I don't think it does. However, I am afraid that it might cause me to feel less... loyal to her than I would have if I had immediately felt the spark fiercely. I think I just need more time, more time in her presence, more time to truly contemplate whether I want she and I to be an 'us', aesthetically speaking.
The aesthetic life is the just-as-difficult other side of the coin of life -- the opposite side bearing the face of ethics. But I think it's about time I started thinking about it more and incorporating it into my life more seriously. It doesn't have to be trivial. The things above that I've listed are all rather important, despite being about appearances. The triviality of aesthetics is a lie.
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