Love of Lights

There are a lot of crows in Scotland. I've noticed this now. On my way to university, as I walk through this area called "The Meadows", I'm almost always confronted with a crow-sighting. Also on the way back from an outing or on the way to one. So the crows have become a symbol of the transit from home to social spaces for me, and vice versa. What does this mean? Crows are elegant black creatures and they move with a curious intelligence. One feels like a crow is  aware  of itself and its surroundings in a way, say, a worm isn't. But despite the intelligence of the crow, I can't help but notice something. Crows are never awkward. They hop and fly about and live their little crow lives, interacting with the world and other creatures and things, but they are never awkward about it. The crow lives intelligently but also peacefully, not suffering by injecting what isn't there into his interpretation of his surroundings. Crows are never awkward. And as I cr...

What greater phenomenon to be observed but magic and miracles? Look around and tell me one thing that isn't magic or a miracle! No, think harder! Dig beyond the surface, Use your tools of rationality and get to the very bottom! Dig, dig, dig, and thud! You've hit it. There's the magic. Unable to be explained, undefined, only able to be comprehended -- the stuff of wisdom. At the end of inquiry lies the poets' object. But look here, the weirdest phenomenon! I am both poet and thing. I am composed of magic and miracles like any rock or any tree, but we find something further gifted (or cursed) to me; I am a poet! I am able to see in myself the magic and miracles; I can feel and comprehend it. I can see with crystal clarity that realm where our explanatory tools fall impotent; where structure ends, where structure is lost, where instead we find deep, black, endless depths, into which we may stare and phantom figures may rise and dance, commanding o...

Earlier this month, I wrote about what I have learnt so far, as I approach my 20th birthday.  Having written the retrospective, I should now like to write the prospective. Entering my second decade of life, what kind of person should I like to become, what should I strive towards, what has worked that I should continue doing? The first thought that comes to mind, which will probably trickle down and affect all other behaviours, is that I should  like to be more fearless. Having  reached 20, it becomes suddenly apparent that one only has 50 or 60 years of life left, or perhaps even less if unlucky. While this is the majority of one's life, one has to remember two things: firstly, as you grow older, time seems to pass more quickly for whatever reason. You begin to more solidly comprehend the blocks of time that are passing. On the other hand, you become more busy and are pigeon-holed into certain areas of life, giving you less liberty as the time goes by, as...

I'm far too tired to be writing this now, but I need to get my head cleared about how I spend time. Normally I would take care to present this so that someone who isn't me at the moment (e.g. a future me) can lucidly understand what's going on, but I'm really too tired, so I'm just going to get to the point. I need to spend my time better otherwise I will feel like I'm neglecting parts of myself and I will be deeply unhappy. I think I need to divide the day into four: - early morning reading time - academic work day time - evening creative work time - late night reading time In this way, I will be doing the 3 things most pertinent to my life at this stage. I get up too late to do early morning reading. I attempt to get up at 8am, but that rarely gives me time to do that early morning reading, save for on a Tuesday and Wednesday. Well, I'm fibbing: it gives me time to do reading on Mondays, Tuesdays, and Wednesdays; only, I rarely wake up in time ...